Contrary to the idea of abstinence, asexuality is a sexual orientation. In contemporary society asexuals are marginalised. AVEN, a society that promotes contact and assistance for asexuals, is fighting to have asexuality recognised by society and that some people neither want nor have desire for sexual interaction.
Like heterosexuality, homosexuality or bisexuality, asexuality is not a choice to be made but rather a state of existence and one in which, for asexuals, there is no frustration in a lack of sexual contact. The absence of desire for sexual relations is, indeed, another category of sexuality –on an equal footing with the others. It’s rather a different way of connecting with other people, as asexuals are generally not attracted by physical contact. Yet, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they can’t be in a relationship – some even maintain sexual relationships for their partner’s benefits, for example. Asexuality is not disgust about the sexual act, but rather a complete absence of desire.
In her book ‘No sex’, Doctor of philosophy Peggy Sastre confirms the difficulties asexuals have affirming themselves in a way that doesn’t create friction with those around them or society in general.
“It’s difficult to make them see that there is neither a problem nor a frustration. Of course, sex is a subject that everyone has their own ideas about and which are on average quite normative . So it’s a difficult coming out in the sense that there are lots of people whose first reaction will be ‘Are you sure? Maybe you haven’t me the right person. Just wait and it’ll happen’ and so on. What I have found interesting is that it’s the same model for a homosexual coming out.’
Furthermore the comparison with the homosexual community is strengthened by the application of how it is judged psychiatrically. The New Edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (or DSM), the American psychiatrist’s bible, is in the process of changing its position on asexuality. Currently it is considered as a psychiatric disorder that causes a lowering of the libido – similar to the definition of homosexuality as a mental affliction until 1973. It could be said that the fight to change the way that asexuals are viewed by society is only just beginning – though with a different goal in sight. Unlike homosexuals though, their aim is not recognition but rather the simple right to be invisible in society.
 Antoine PANAITE
|
05/06/2021 | 
